Hey y’all, and happy freakin August 🤠

Anyone who knows anything about my life knows a few things. I live to honor my mom. I love my kids on a level that words will never touch. My husband is my actual best friend. My sister is my savior. And I love the simple things in life the most, like my hot morning coffee, and the sunshine.

Recently, my husband decided to book an extremely last minute trip to Florida. I sat on his lap as we were booking the flights and said “it feels like we’re running away!” He replied, it’s because we kind of are. Truly, it felt like we were breaking a law. Because why 🤔 I’m not sure. Maybe because we had just gone away in May? Maybe because we were going to Florida with a bunch of friends who had this planned for months!? Maybe because it was one of the most spontaneous things we have ever done with 3 kids along for the (first airplane) ride?!

In addition to “if you know us” you probably know we started homeschooling in 2019. We are about to begin our 5th year, and it feels insane to state that fact! Along the way, we lost some friends. We had lots of people judge what we decided to do. We even had friends and family mock the new journey that we had put endless thought and time into. But we began. We started scared. Knowing in our hearts it was the right thing. We started, and with the weight of everyone’s opinions.

As if their opinions cried next to us when we discovered rights of ours as New Yorkers were stripped. As if their opinions helped us research a single detail of our decisions. As if their opinions paid for the books and materials we have bought, or then, the laughs we have shared and the freaking amazing memories we have made having all our babies under one roof learning and doing life together. As if their opinions held any weight after all. We’ve been doing the damn thing, and we do it W E L L 💪🏼 😊 (honestly the people who doubt me fuel the fire in me to keep going so thank you 🙏🏼 for your help)

When we went to Florida, we knew why it felt crazy. Because we were looking to leave. We are, and have been looking for our new place in the world for the last 4 years. We wanted it to jump out at us, pull us in and have us fall in love with it. A town, a city, a coast line, a neighborhood, anything! Inside this trip, we had officially started the search to get out of NY. While we didn’t get any of that in Florida, we gained so much more. We realized instead – that we really freaking LIKE eachother. We ✨like✨ spending time together as a family of 5. We enjoy adventures and exploring together. We are here for the laughter that has built a roof over our heads and the joy of being together, the walls around us. We have finally realized that our home is inside the love we share. We now know, we can bring this show any WHERE on any ROAD and that we will make it anywhere – as long as we’re together. (Read this section and then listen to The Bones by Maren Morris and tell me you’re not sobbing bc I’m sobbing)

This trip of spontaneously leaving, really, has brought me home to myself. It’s the comeback I didn’t see coming. This impromptu getaway was life 👏🏻 give 👏🏻 ing 👏🏻

Every day, breathing perspective, gratitude and vision into my soul. It redefined my identity, my role as a wife and mother, and it did the same for my husband, too. This trip has strengthened our marriage. This trip gave us the direction we needed to begin to pray for God’s grace in our lives’ next steps together. This trip has changed my life in a way I couldn’t see coming until we left and connected. Recharged, regrouped, and every other motivational quote you’ve ever read on Pinterest – it did that for us. We spent time with people we’ve collected and kept. People from our lives before children, who are real, with stories that captivate you. They are living lives worth celebrating, and all because they made a leap of faith. They believed in themselves and eachother. That shit inspired the hell out of me. And made me want more🙏🏼

We truly don’t know what the future for us holds. We are rooted deeply in upstate NY with family and forever friends. But we have forever friends in far away places too. And places that we don’t even know are special to us yet. We have people who cheer us on, and encourage us to be the best we can be during this lifetime. We have eachother and we have so much love between us, and that is finally shining bright for us to see that we are all we really need. Scary thought? Also, ✨awesome✨ thought. Ahhh. That duality of perspective again 💭

So as I usually do, I write to sort. I wear a bleeding heart on my sleeve and when I write, it’s calming, it provides me with direction, and as always, it prompts peace inside me. Our time away has opened my eyes to so many more possibilities for the future we’ve been hoping for, that I didn’t even think of. It’s about giving and taking, preparing and praying, it’s about letting the moment be the moment. We all are guilty of being so wrapped up in what’s next that we forget to stick our feet in the earth and look up to thank God for answering the prayers we’re living out right now. Not everyone will understand the things I believe in, or why, and that’s ok. I’m at the point in life where I don’t need to be understood. Not everyone will like the journey I’m on, and that too, is ok, because it’s not about them. I love the people who have made my life worth living, but I love us, our little family of 5 sooo much more. And I’d bet my bottom dollar on every star that hangs in every sky, that no matter where we go, we’re gonna shine. The five of us, dwelling in happiness, health and gratitude ✨